WORLD NURSERY RHYME WEEK starts on the 19th November 2018, a time when we can celebrate and share our favourite musical numbers… hahahahaha yeah right, have you heard some of the lyrics in these songs?
Most are borderline ridiculous, others make zero sense, some encourage our children to hurt or maim others and the rest are just down right annoying! So, that being said, here’s my top 10 nursery rhymes that I really detest and encourage you not to expose your children too!
TOP 10 NURSERY RHYMES YOU SHOULDN’T LET YOUR CHILDREN LISTEN TO!
#1 Hush Little Baby
“If that mocking bird don’t sing, momma’s going to buy you a diamond ring”... I mean seriously!?
In order to get a child to not say a word, momma buys her precious little one something new. When that doesn’t work properly, momma promptly buys something else completely inappropriate… because that ALWAYS works! 🤣
#2 Johnny, Johnny
A song about a naughty child, eating sugar and lying about it… TWICE and then laughs in his papa’s face! No wonder this is one of my kids favourites!
#3 The Old Woman Who Lived in a Shoe
An old woman with too many kids, she struggles to feed them and then beats them before sending them to bed. Actually, typing that has actually made me like it a bit more haha… but I don’t think I need too stress my point about this one, do I?
#4 Goosey Goosey Gander
“There I met an old man who wouldn’t say his prayers, so I took him by the left leg and threw him down the stairs”
Talk about a bit of old fashioned christian guilt! I’m not sure chucking someone down the stairs for not saying their prayers has any place in 2018 or does it? I’ve just started the boys at a C of E pre-school, should I be worried?
#5 The Alphabet Song
Now I know this might come as a surprise to you that I would put such a good educational song on the list, well hear me out!
I’ve been singing this song AT the boys for well over a year now, in the desperate hope that they pick it up and learn their ABCs. But actually I’ve now been told not to confuse them with capital letters and that we should be teaching them phonics with abc! So, why do we even have this advanced song on playlists for toddlers?? Damn it! Anyone know a good song to teach the lower case version?
#6 Georgie Porgie
Kissing girls and making them cry… hmmm, need I go on?
#7 Rock-a-Bye-Baby
Poorly manufactured nursery furniture that results in a falling baby does not make a good rhyme IMO!
#8 Three Blind Mice
Poor visually impaired mice, suffering violence at the hands of the farmers wife. So many things wrong in this;
- Violence against the disabled
- Animal cruelty
- Farmers wife… does she not have her own name or title or is she just somebody’s wife?
I rest my case!
#9 Ten Little Monkeys
Ten little sh*ts more like it. How many more times do they have to be told to stop jumping on the f***ing bed? Apologies for my excessive swearing but this level of disrespect is unacceptable… bring back Super Nanny I say!
#10 Daddy Finger
And last but not least, this hideous song that plagues the kids youtube channels. The song drives me insane, as someone who spends all day every day listening to two children saying ‘daddy daddy’ over and over, I do not need to hear it in song version… especially not when sticking the kids in front of the iPad is the only break I get from it!
Also, what’s with all the weirdos on kids youtube using this song to do equally weird things with toys. I call them weirdos but actually I’m pretty jealous of the thousands they are probably making off it!
WHAT’S YOUR LEAST FAVOURITE NURSERY RHYME AND WHY?
LOL… what side of the bed did Daddy wake up on? I say it’s the dark side ha! You miserable sod…
The lyrics are archaic at best… but I do enjoy reading about the history of some of the rhymes, for example… #4 Goosey Goosey Gander dates back to the 16th century were Catholics were persecuted by Protestants during the Reformation era. #8 Three Blind Mice – it’s origin again dates back to Queen Mary 1, and the death of 3 Protestants. I love Google! ha. Singing about an epoch in British history – well it’s a lesson in itself!
Ah Google, that explains it! Thought for a minute there that you must have taken a nursery rhyme module during your history degree days😜
Lol… You got me!! We did touch on the historical connotations of various nursery rhymes, but not in my degree. I was lying in my own pi@s and vomit at uni so can’t tell you what we discussed 🤣
Trust you to chose nursery rhymes with religious undertones in them… no wonder you don’t like them!
I didn’t even choose them on purpose! Definitely something subconscious at work there!🤣
Indeed!! Daddy Finger 🙄… umpteen times a day I hear that – those youtubers are making a fortune off the clicks my boys make on them videos, at the risk of my sanity!
ABC… have you said abc in lower case out loud… it’s bloody tough!!
12 Comments
Jo (A Rose Tinted World)
Was just thinking about this with ‘Rock A Bye Baby’…. The baby falls…eh?
My favourite (not) at the moment is obviously ‘robot vending machine’ For a start it doesn’t even rhyme….Arghhhh!
Phil @ ParentingPhils
Robot vending machine??? 🤔 I’ll have to youtube that one… or should I? 😬🤣
Jo (A Rose Tinted World)
It will definitely be an earworm if you do! I’m now singing it in my head at just being reminded! And even better…IT DOESN’T RHYME! (my absolute pet hate with some of these songs! – argh!) #ItsOK
kate - the mum conundrum
Arrrrggghhh!!! Fecking Daddy Finger!
Did you know there are actual rip-offs off that all over the shop too? The other day I found my toddler watching ‘Daddy Monkey’ on Kids Youtube?!
Why? Just why?!?
Thanks for linking up with #ItsOk (and cheers for the earworm!) xxx
Phil @ ParentingPhils
It drives me insane, why they have to sing that song with everything I have no idea!
Caroline
Haha! Oh this did make me laugh! Yep, we are in the ‘baby shark’ and ‘eating sugar’ song loop courtesy of cocomelon on YouTube (our kids are obsessed, sob!) I have yet to experience the delights of ‘daddy finger’ although too terrified to google it!!! #itsok xxx
Phil @ ParentingPhils
HOW ON EARTH HAVE YOU MANAGED TO AVOID DADDY FINGER?? 🤣🤷🏼♂️
Nicole - Tales from Mamaville
I have ALWAYS wondered about nursery rhymes – they are pure evil and just mean! Nothing happy and good happens in them.
And I’m currently paying the price for ABC as my reception-going son writes his name in Upper Case now!
Thanks for joining us on #itsok!!!
Phil @ ParentingPhils
Hey at least your reception-going son can write!! 🤣
Daydreams of a Mum
This really made me giggle !! I often feel like the old woman who lived in the shoe with my tribe (witoout the mindless violence obviously) and I have certainly come across a few Georgie Porgie’s in my time!!
Congrats!! Someone loved this post so much they added it as their #blogcrush!!!
Phil @ ParentingPhils
Thanks Kelly, glad you liked it 😃
Crummy Mummy
Johnny Johnny & Daddy Finger are the worst – along with Baby Shark if you can even call that a nursery rhyme! #itsok