The other week Phil asked me if I fancied doing a co-written piece with him on self-care for our blog, which I thought was a great idea because it’s been on my mind A LOT these days.
Before I start though, it must be known that I am that typical disheveled mother, who wishes to be the yummy mummy but is too bloody knackered to do something about it, and the list of jobs and mothering boys (1&3) far out-way, well, ME!
Until this happened…
A few months back a comment was made to me that literally THREW ME, and I thought something drastic needs to be done! I do feel bad relaying this on here, but it’s important to mention because its the catalyst of why the self-care of ME needs to happen pretty pronto!
One normal boring day, I was talking to a younger guy and another lady about something random, and ‘age’ came into the conversation… can’t remember the particulars of the conversation but I most definitely remember the end part. When discussing ‘age’ the lady in question shouted to me “Philippa you’re about the same age as me, right?!!”
My face was a picture, and must have looked something like that Edvard Munich painting ‘The Scream’.
To put it politely I was bloody horrified!! There’s nothing I can do here to not sound disrespectful so am just going to say it… this woman is knocking on 60’s door!!! Either this lady has beef with me, or I’m looking f****** haggard of late!!
After spending weeks/months trying to get over the throw-away comment (I hoped), I started looking at myself more closely, and to my horror, spotted deep lines, dry aged skin, open pores you could swim in and generally just someone who doesn’t look like me. Shamefully, this woman wasn’t far off in her estimates…
So its time for a change!!
Operation ‘Let’s Get Philippa Back‘ is in full swing with my second facial booked for next week. I’ve invested in some serious anti-aging gear from Clarins and ditched the leggings and baggy t-shirts that I’ve been walking round in since the boys where born. I’ve lost some weight – nowhere near where I plan to be, but its moving in the right direction, and let’s face it, its a loss so I’m taking it!!
I’m drinking water like a fish to try and hydrate my skin and popping multivits and pro-biotics like a machine. I plan to overhaul my wardrobe once I’m at my target weight, and I’m going to start making some all-important time for ME. Though I do feel like I’ve said this before 🤷
I’m under no illusion that this is going to happen over-night, and I can envisage it taking at least a good 12 months or so until I feel/look like myself again – which is fine, the point is, its a serious step change I aim to keep up… coz lady, I aint bloody 60 thank you very much.
Kick-up the backside received!!
Phil: Given it’s a post about self-care I’ll refrain from cracking a joke about you looking 60, mostly because I’m feeling your pain!
The reason I asked you if you fancied doing this piece was because I looked in the mirror the other day at a wrinkly, black-eyed, unshaven monster who’d been in a bad mood and snappy with the family for what felt like weeks. And your reference to ‘The Scream’ is EXACTLY how I felt!
I suddenly remembered something I had read a few years back and not really thought much of it at the time. I can’t remember for the life of me which genius wrote it but it was something along the lines of parents making the mistake and treating their kids as the priority, meeting all their needs before your own, when actually if you don’t look after yourself first then you are doing them a injustice by not being able to give them your fullest and in some cases actually doing more harm than good if you are snappy and lethargic or more serious, stressed and/or depressed!
At the time of reading it, I don’t think I really took it in properly and it’s only now that I’m looking tired and aged after just a few years of parenthood, that the light bulb has come on.
In this moment I also realised that I don’t actually do anything significant for myself in a way of self-care apart from the [very] rare kid free night out with friends.
So I wanted to challenge myself, and you Pips, because I was guessing you were in a similar boat by the way we were both talking (or not so much as the case has been)! The challenge being to set 3 things each that we can do for ourselves and commit to.
After some head scratching, here’s mine…
- Grooming – At the first sight of ginger in the beard, I WILL SHAVE! I invested in some face stuff from Tropic a while back that’s been gathering dust so I’m also going to commit to using it at least 1-2 times a week!
- Stop fixating on my weight – The truth is it hasn’t really changed much in years and all I do is talk about how I’m going to lose it. Not anymore! I’m going to stop putting pressure on myself and using it as a tool to beat myself up. I’m just going to embrace it and if I lose some then great but no more worrying! (Easier said than done, right?)
- Writing – For years I’ve been ridiculed about wanting to write children’s books. Recently I got back into it and finally finished one! So now I’m currently sending off to literary agents to see what their response is. But if it’s not a goer, then it doesn’t matter. The fact is I really enjoyed doing it and has made me feel like I’m doing something other than ‘dadding’, doing wonders for my esteem, which in truth has been pretty low of late! So more writing and pestering agents to come!!! Sorry I need a 4th…
- A man M.O.T- For a while there’s been a few things bothering me, some cosmetic and some just niggles and I’ve not prioritised getting seen by a doctor/nurse. I’m getting [too] close to 40 so it’s time to ‘man-up’ and go have a full check up I reckon.
Pips: Challenge accepted, and already underway my friend! I mean I do have 20+ years to claw back… right?? Here’s mine…
- Cleanse, Tone and Moisturise – Sounds simple but do you actually do all 3 skin-care routines?
- Sunday night relaxing hot bath with sea salt crystals – Perfect time to actually shave my legs!
- Treat – Mine is a pro-vitamin facial per month. It’s so relaxing I actually let out a piggy snore on the table…oops!
Phil: PMSL at you piggy snoring during a facial!
Take care of yourselves everyone, it’s way too easy to let it slip whilst your running about after little people and before you know it, BOOM, you feel like a fraction of your former self.
Tell us what 3 things you do or could do to look after yourself!
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